Overwhelm, stress, and overall dissatisfaction with life have become the new pandemic. These are the real killers literally and figuratively, causing unease in workplaces, damaging relationships, and wasting arguably the most precious thing of them all – time.
In this interview, the Transformational Coach and founder of Redefining Success, Ruta Stasiunaite, explains how to dissolve overwhelm, effectively handle stressful situations and conflicts, and build the muscle of emotional stability, assembling the needed conditions for a truly fulfilling, peaceful and successful life.
Welcome, Ruta; great to have you. Let’s jump right in; what makes our lives so stressful and overwhelming?
“In short, wanting more is what makes life stressful and overwhelming. We have been conditioned to constantly desire something we do not have instead of feeling content with what we see in front of us. Plus, we rush to get to that imaginative destination which adds unnecessary pressure. Now, it does not mean we are meant to stagnate and live aimlessly. Instead, it means prioritizing internal wellbeing and setting mindful intentions for the future.”
Does that mean we need to become more self-aware to avoid stress and overwhelm?
“Yes and no. The internal turbulence so many of us experience often originates from the disconnect from who we truly are. In other words, we’ve created lives that didn’t bring the expected fulfilment, joy, happiness, and peace simply because we have built upon and achieved things not aligned with our deepest desires in order to genuinely enjoy the process. For example, painters and musicians have become lawyers; nature lovers have built lives in cities. And then, we’ve also subconsciously stored emotional triggers based on past experiences, like wounds that can be healed with awareness.
However, self-awareness alone is not enough to end stress. To become emotionally stable, one must have enough curiosity and attentiveness to notice those triggers and instantly reverse them with compassion and acceptance. It’s not about living in paradise with no challenges; it’s about learning how to deal with those challenges that makes life peaceful.”
Some people may say they have too much on their plate to work on self-awareness and emotional stability. What would you suggest to them?
“I would remind them that we only have one life to live; thus, the way we choose to approach life is entirely up to us. It might not seem like an easy journey to begin with, but once we pick up the speed and get into the habit of questioning every trigger, emotion, and thought – life becomes a smooth sail. Is it worth the effort? You bet it is! I cannot express enough how many people have transformed their lives for the better, simply because they committed to the journey of self-enquiry!”
We imagine self-enquiry and curiosity positively affect various areas of life. What do people normally experience as a result of this work?
“This work refines and even transforms romantic relationships, family dynamics, friendships, career, business, internal wellbeing, and so much more. Some of my clients have said their 25-year long marriage has never been better. Some have improved previously very destructive relationships with their children and parents.
Some have reached unbelievable success in business not because they stressed themselves out but because they have become more focused, purposeful, and trusting than ever. Life becomes an exciting journey on a moment-by-moment basis rather than a constant chase which helps you relax and truly enjoy the ride.
Saying that, once the intention becomes to live in the now without delaying anything, we make peace with what is and accept situations as they are without resistance and resentment. And even better, it starts becoming increasingly joyful and fulfilling as people, experiences, and opportunities show up, aligned with the new vision.”
So, would you say that stress and overwhelm are bi-products of lack of intention and clarity?
“Absolutely. People lack direction in life, so they try and grab whatever they see around them. Copying other people’s seeming successes just to realize that it wasn’t it; it didn’t feel authentic to them. As soon as you become determined to drop all the masks and superficialities – you step into the comfort of your own unique path that’s only meant for you and no one else. Stress and overwhelm have no place there because you are at peace with yourself and your daily choices. You are in charge of your conscious life.”
That sounds liberating! What last piece of advice would you like to give our readers?
“Never stop seeking and believing in your right to live the way your heart deeply desires.”
Interested in knowing more about Ruta Stasiunaite and her work with Redefining Success?
Or get in touch with her by sending an email at email@example.com.
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