Matt Artisan is shaking up the dating coaching industry. He is the CEO of Attractive Man, a professional dating company that is changing the lives of men all over the world. Artisan and The Attractive Man help men bring out their true attractive selves without having to memorize lines and routines or pretend to be someone they aren’t. He’s taught live workshops in over 40 countries including China, Japan, India, UAE, and Qatar. Below he discusses what confidence really is and how technology has affected dating.
What’s the best way for a man to meet a woman?
There are a lot of ways to meet women, however, at The Attractive Man, we teach that the best places are usually places where there is the least competition, such as a shopping center, book stores, or coffee shops. Almost no men try to meet women in everyday situations anymore because of fear of looking awkward. So, they resort to meeting women at bars and clubs or on mobile dating apps like Tinder and Bumble. But the problem with using the common way of meeting women is that you are competing with every other guy in the bar or on the app. This is why we show men how to stand out when using online dating or when going to a bar or club and, better yet, how to effectively and confidently approach and attract women in everyday situations.
What should he say?
When most guys approach a beautiful woman, they beat around the bush and hide their interest and it often comes off as a lack of confidence. Women typically know the reason a man walked up to them, so using some weird indirect pickup artist method often backfires. Instead, at The Attractive Man, we teach our clients to be honest when they approach a woman in an everyday situation. The reason a man is approaching a woman is usually that he’s attracted to her and he wants to see if her inner beauty matches her outer beauty. So we show guys how to show their interest in a confident, charming way that is never creepy. And women love it; they literally light up when our clients approach them.
Is dating all about meeting people online and texting nowadays?
For the 99.9% of single men who are too afraid to walk up to a woman at a coffee shop or an everyday situation, yes. Most guys rely on online apps to meet women because it’s convenient, easy, and comfortable. The problem is like I said before, they are competing against all the other guys on the app. The best way to stand out is to go up to women where there is zero competition. Places like book stores, coffee shops, malls, shopping centers, the street, beaches, etc. If you take The Attractive Man Bootcamp we would first bring in models to roleplay with you to help you perfect your approach and then we would take you to a beach, mall, or downtown area to approach and attract women in-person. Most of our clients end up meeting the woman of their dreams in an everyday situation. And, to tell you the truth, most women say they would much rather meet a man at the grocery store than on Tinder because not only do they get to meet the “real” person but it’s a much better story to tell their friends and family.
Has dating become superficial because of technology?
For the average person who only relies on meeting women online, yes, because meeting the person is based on having attractive pictures, writing a good bio, and copy-and-paste messages. That is why we are bringing back authenticity to dating and meeting people and showing our clients that it’s okay to meet people in everyday situations. When you pass by an attractive person on the street, you don’t have to think, “Wow I hope I match with her on Tinder.” You can confidently go up to her and tell her you that you find her attractive and meet her. But it’s all in how you do it. There’s a charming, confident, right way to do it, and there’s a creepy, awkward timid way to do it that will not work. We show guys how to approach with confidence.
What is confidence really?
A client recently asked me, “Matt Artisan, what is your definition of confidence?” I told him that I see confidence as believing in yourself, trusting yourself, loving yourself, and accepting yourself, while still working on becoming the best you. So when it comes to dating it’s the willingness to go up to her and talk to her. It’s knowing that even if you say the wrong thing, everything will be okay. It’s the belief that you are a good guy that women will like. The problem is that most guys put on a “proverbial mask” when they approach a woman because they are trying to mask their insecurities and trying to be the person they think she wants them to be. Women can often sense when a guy is being fake or being a “nice guy.” This shows a lack of confidence and turns her off.
And can anyone become confident?
Anyone can become confident in themselves and confident approaching and talking to women if they work on the outer game of dating, taking action the right way, and the inner game of dating, releasing the thoughts, beliefs, and emotional baggage that keeps people stuck. While most other dating coach companies put a “band-aid” over their client’s insecurities further masking their issues, at The Attractive Man, we take a holistic approach to work on your true inner confidence, as well as, what you should do and say to get a woman attracted to you. And everything is customized to your unique personality, situation, and challenges so you don’t have to change into someone you are not. Instead, we just turn you into the best, most confident, total of ten versions of yourself so you can ultimately meet, attract, and date your dream woman.
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