How often have you heard that trope, the one about how we women can have it all? After all, we’re master jugglers. We can shatter that glass ceiling, take care of our home and family, have flourishing social lives—and look pretty doing all of it. There’s no reason we can’t use the 24 hours we get in a day to do that; I mean, it just takes a little goal setting and some hard work, right?
If that sounds crazy to you, I’m right there with you! After we’re done cooking, cleaning, priming, preening, and climbing all those steps up those corporate ladders, when do we sleep, eat, and relax?
If it sounds impossible, it’s because it usually is. Sure, we all have 24 hours, but the idea that we all have the same 24 hours is a fallacy. Some people have a lot more help, whether it’s financial or otherwise. Something as simple as having someone help get the kids to school while you do your hair can make a world of difference.
So, maybe we can’t “have it all” as quickly as it’s assumed we can, but that doesn’t mean we can’t have anything. The trick is to stop holding ourselves to these absurd standards and to start empowering each other. We can help one another reach goals within a shared community that lifts and cheers on other women when we do this. Invest in yourself, and you’ll feel different almost instantly.
Put Yourself First
Yes, that’s right. Yourself. Not your career, not your “goals.” In fact, did you know that some goal setting can be unhealthy? The yardstick used to measure success these days can be impossible, toxic, and even unhealthy. Instead of burning out, invest in a bit of self-care.
When you care for yourself, you give yourself more of an ability to care for others around you. You know that idea of us being able to have it all? A little self-care can get you closer to that than trying to pour from an empty cup. Consider how much more you will have to give, the more you give yourself.
Self-care can be taking time out of a busy day to cook your favorite meal, listen to music, go for a walk to let off a little steam, or simply stare out of the window to clear your mind. Caring for your mental health is a lot more important than shattering glass ceilings. And it can also help you get there without burnout!
Stimulate Your Mind
Now that I’ve got you thinking about your mental health, here are some other ways to help make it your primary focus. Consider stimulating your mind with something other than chores and work and all those goals and aspirations people keep telling you to have. To truly empower ourselves, it’s important to first empower our minds.
It doesn’t matter whether you’re doing the daily crossword or playing a game of Scrabble with your friends. Challenge yourself to use your mind to think of something that doesn’t directly affect the course of your day.
Another good way to stimulate your brain and keep your mind active but relaxed at the same time is to read. It can be non-fiction, fiction, genre-specific—it doesn’t really matter what you’re reading as long as you’re reading something.
If reading a physical book isn’t really your thing, try an audiobook! Whether you read the newspaper, a financial blog, or a novel, you can slowly start to use this reading skill to target areas of your life that need inspiration. This doesn’t mean you have to read primarily self-help books. Read a business memoir to get entrepreneurial juices flowing or a novel about motherhood to help inspire you in your family life.
Redefine What Success Means
You know all that advice about how work is work, and you don’t have to love it, you just have to do it? Throw all that out the window. Sure, you can’t always do exactly what you love or have a ball of a time every day. Some jobs are harder than others, and sometimes you have to make sacrifices to reach your goals. Some successes are surprisingly different from what you thought they would be.
But with all of this in mind, is it really worth it if you spend the majority of your day depressed about what you’re doing? Life shouldn’t be so much of a chore that you can no longer feel excited about getting out of bed every morning. Try to orbit yourself around things that excite you and motivate you, push you to keep going.
The only way to build a life and career that you love is to work towards it. Instead of simply accepting your lot, research your options, find a community that empowers you, and steer clear of naysayers and negative Nancys.
Once you’ve figured out how to work a career that excites you, work can stop feeling like a burden! Don’t want to be a CEO or prominent executive? Don’t! Want to figure out how to work from anywhere in the world? Do it! Is your idea of the perfect life one in which you call all the shots? Go get it! Remember, success is what you make it—a fulfilling, successful career for you doesn’t have to mimic what you’ve been taught to believe success should look like.
About Get It Girl LLC:
Get It Girl is on a mission to empower women and young girls who need a helping hand to achieve their life goals. Get It Girl provides resources, networking groups and programs that elevate education, employment, and mentoring opportunities. For more information, visit https://getitgirlsllc.com/